Practically Proverbs 31: Determined to Save more money

She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard. She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks. She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night.

Proverbs 31:16-18

Okay, this lady makes some money for her family. The way I see it that gives me two choices find a way family friendly job (I do work for the preschool completely around and with my families schedule). The second thing is to figure ways to and save lots of money and actively purse them. I believe that this has to be a priority during my life. I may not always have a job, in fact I have not always had a job, but I must always look for ways to save money and to only spend what is necessary to get the job done.

It's like when I make the choice between buying Tide or Arm&Hammer laundry soap, of course I want to use Tide, who doesn't it's Tide it gets things so clean they use it to clean Porto potties and it smells like heaven! But Arm& Hammer does the job at 1/3 the cost! So my choice (though not always) is Arm&Hammer because I want to live that Proverb 31 life and save my family $9-13.(right now I use homemade laundry detergent but you get the idea!)


Anyways, recently I've been looking at everything I do and trying to figure ways to save more money in our home. My recent exploits into saving money:

Dishwasher-

1. I am making my own dishwasher soap. Kim is going to run the figures and let me know if there is savings here.
2. I turned off the heat dry & hot start options! The first thing I noticed is that when the dishes go into the dishwasher when the extra hot water is turned off you have to make sure those dishes have been well rinsed. Otherwise food debris remains stuck to the utensils and things. Other than that the dishes are still a little wet but If I see a savings in my utility bill I will continue to do this.

House -

I am asking Wayne to turn our water heater down. Now if you've ever been to my house and used hot water your thinking its about time you decided against 3rd degree burns! But I love HOT water, I have a high pain tolerance and well ...its costing me money so I'm turning it down.

1. We are getting a water heater "cozies" & insulate the pipes which is suppose to make your water heater much more efficient. Water heater represents 14% of your cooling cost!


2. We are slowly changing all of the bulbs in our house from regular bulbs to the spiral bulbs. In my house this should represent a savings of $42.38 per month according to MidSouth Synergy!

I'll let you know if I see a savings on my Electric Bill! Last month we did decrease our bill considerably.

This is what we do now:

1. I avoid turning on lights during the day. Except in the school room, it's a little dark. Once my kids cheered when they asked if they could turn on the lights and I said "yes". Parker said "Yeah!!! We get to turn on the lights" ...that's just sad, but true!


2. I turn off all lights I find left on! Basically, I've become my Dad and I am eternally aware of any light left on in the house!


3. We keep the thermostat set to 69* for heating and 78-9* for cooling. Right now we have it turned off completely if it gets to 80* I will turn on the ceiling fans!


4. Turn my computer off during the day and at night! I try to have it on for less than 6 hours per day (this one kills me sometimes, but it also prevents me from wasting time...looking something up real quick!)


5. We unplugged the extra fridge in the Shed because we were not using it for anything but extra drinks. We have ice on our fridge for that!


6. Major appliances (dishwasher, washing machine, dryer) get to rest on Sundays!

What do you do?

A lesson on Shabby Chic Decorating

I never can get a room pulled together just how I like it. I go to so many folks homes and their houses are so cute and look like they let a decorator loose (like beautiful Kirby Apel). Then you ask them about it and they reveal the truth, they did it themselves natural talent. Usually at this point my jaw drops open and I begin to wonder if I am color blind or just blind as I think of my house. As I've asked more people I've found out some decorate quickly and some overtime. I will always remember Mrs. Pratt's house all throughout her house were these great garage sale finds I specifically remember a set of 3 bamboo nesting tables. Much of which she purchased when her kids were young and money was tight while her hubby finished school. A while back I went to the Hendricks house they have this really cool casual totally pulled together look that I loved, Shabby Chic. I had tried Shabby Chic before and it really just looked Shabby, never quite made it to chic. So I asked Heather how did you do it? She told me the mistake everyone makes is the colors just look thrown together but they are really a part of a color palette. Palette that's a chic word. So off to the paint store I went to get the color palette that went with the colors on my walls. I was so excited to find out that my colors were Potter Barn colors. I'm not sure why I was so excited I NEVER buy anything from them. I just love their catalog, it's like a decorating magazine to me...oh, I digress, back to the paint store.....I also purchased 1 gallon of paint from that palette (before the house was built and we had a little money, I'm still saving for a second color!) The other thing she said that really got my attention is that for the most part any thing works with Shabby Chic you just have to paint it to go with the decor. Since Peyton was sick M0n-Wed and Parker got pink eye on Wed we are off from school so today is the perfect day to....PAINT! I love to get things off the side of the road, recently Julie Burnham found a little kids school desk and chair on the side of the road and brought it to me...How that warms my heart! Now Heather has revealed all I have to do is paint it into the correct color palette and I've got some winning decor. Now doesn't that frame "pop"? Thanks Heather you are multi-talented, a Godly woman and with a side of decorating genius!

How does my garden grow?

This is my third garden (Summer, Fall and now winter). In the first two gardens I grew a lot of tomatoes, but as far as everything else I grew allot of big green plants that hardly produced any vegetables! Very frustrating for someone as frugal as me. This winter has already been more successful. We've been eating Spinach out of the garden. Now we have lettuce that is ready to start eating it, here is the salad we had with dinner. I've done lots of reading about plants in Storey's Basic Country Skills, Year Round Vegetable Gardener and the Tiny Farm Blog is a great inspiration...so this summer is looking promising. We've decided organic gardening is the way to go. Also, I have obeyed Farmer Jason and started my seedlings I hope to be eating well out of my garden by this time next year. I will be getting a soil test and well get some mushroom compost for the little garden before April. So Julie...wanna go to Madisionville?

You know even though I have not been the best gardener. Gardening has taught me a lot about

God, when I thin out crops I don't snatch up the big healthy plants you choose those that are not flourishing. I prune the branches that are bearing no fruit, in poor soil or somehow in the wrong row.

John 15:2He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful.

I imagine to God it is as obvious if we are flourshing or not if our branches are empty, if there isn't a single tomato on our bush. If I see a naked tomato bush I know there is something wrong with that tomato. Its the soil, water the fertilizer or something. But if after I've addressed the issue it's still fruit less it has to go to make room for a plant that will fruit. Our lives are that obvious to God. He can see if our branches are empty or full. We can fool ourselves but not Him. Just like I try to nurse a plant on to vigor, I imagine God does the same thing. But just as I prune & cull the plants that are failing I also imagine God is doing that too. So how's your fruit?

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Galatians 5:22-23

RH

Making your home a Haven: Introduction

As we go through this book discussion I am just going to record my thoughts on certain questions and things within the book. Sometimes I may go off on my own topic that is related to the chapter. If you have a specific question about the chapter post it in the comments and I will happily respond (you can check a box in the comment section and all comments will be sent to your e-mail box!). I have also decided to show actual pictures of my house, instead of other folks homes, so it may get scary! Also, as we approach chapter 6 I may offer a couple of at my house "BASIC COOKING" instruction dates, for folks like me that are lost or nearly lost in the kitchen. There will also be periodic calls for recipes so keep your eyes peeled! Finally, I've asked Cyndy Salzmann to comment if she can, so hopefully we will benefit from the authors own insights.

Introduction: Surviving without Alice

Comments on page 7 "Chaos"..."Each day I waded through piles of laundry, stacks of papers, inches of dust and a mountain of frustration. We ate at fast-food places so often my children complained they were getting duplicates of the toys in the kids meals. My husband no longer looked in his drawer for underwear-he went straight to the dryer and let out a war whoop of delight if he found a clean pair."

Well this is what we want to escape. This is what we are putting off and we are putting on order. Because we do not serve a God of chaos but a God of order! I grew up in a household where I received no training to be a housewife. I was blessed by different folks in my adult life who came along side me and taught me to cook (Carol McVay, Wayne's wonderful step mom), clean (Vangie Clark - Grandma), how to decorate (Kelli Hudson) and to most importantly how love the Lord (Mrs Nordstrom (Grace & LHBC), Presley & Pratt from Central Baptist).

Thoughts on question 2: This chapter reminded me of the ideas that I had before I came home to be a homemaker. I really thought it was going to be easy. My house would always be clean and I would like like a hip brown version (Halle Berry) of June Cleaver! When I first got home it was so hard to transition from working women to homemaker. My first couple of months I treated homemaking as a kind of extended vacation and did not approach homemaking as my job. Consequently, my family was hungry or poorly feed (because I was a horrible cook!), the house was dirty and the laundry undone. The worst part is that I really felt like it was partially Wayne's fault because he wouldn't help me. So not only was I not doing my job I was irritated with my husband because he would not do my job. My house had CHAOS (Can't have anyone over syndrome...a flylady saying) and I was sure it was some else's fault! I'm sure when Wayne got home he didn't feel relief comfort, peace, safety or love how could he there was no place to sit & nothing to eat!

Genesis 2:18 says: " The LORD God said, "It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him."."

For me this was the hardest transition to recognize that this is my job and not Wayne's. That he can help me if he chooses to but if he doesn't want to he doesn't have to. I never go to his job and help him work (thus he is still employed!) and meet his deadlines! As we just read the Bible clearly says I am suppose to help him not the other way around. So it was difficult for me to realize that I was his helper, he was not mine. Also that I was serving the Lord by helping him and making sure he had clean socks, underwear , ironed shirts, pants, food etc..

Also as we've added children things have become more challenging and I can see why the Proverbs 31 women gets up before sunrise. You have to get time in with the Lord to start your house off on the right foot. I am still trying to get up early enough to get Wayne's breakfast made, right now I make extras and save/freeze them for him. He heats it in the morning and he goes off on his merry way...feed!

Homeschooling and housekeeping do not go together well because they both take up a lot of time. I often have to make sure I focus completely on what I am doing until I am done. So I school from 9-12 and homemake after school is done.

I have the children do purposeful chores which is both a challenge and a joy. My kids clean windows, baseboards, bathrooms (excluding toilets & tubs), load dishes, fold some laundry, sort all laundry, put some laundry away.... So it is a joy that they do many things for me that I no longer have to do. But the training of the children does take some time. I am unable to do any of my chores while the two younger ones are doing their chores. I have to stay on top of them. Yes, Pearson (2 1/2 ) has chores!

Thoughts on question 8: Dictionary.com says the following about haven:

–noun
1.a harbor or port.
2.any place of shelter and safety; refuge; asylum. –verb (used with object)
3.to shelter, as in a haven.

I think my home is more of a haven now then it has ever been but it could definitely use fine tuning. I decorate in a way that is kid friendly, welcoming and easy to keep up. You'll notice my couch is not facing the window, we simply can fit more people into the house the way the furniture is arranged.We have 30 folks (adults & kids) that attend our HOPE group on Wednesdays, 3 neighbor kids, Maass' on Sunday etc... Accordingly our house is decorated to entertain. All three girls share one room so we can keep a room open for guests. We have concrete floors so folks can spill anything and I can smile all the way to the Biff (aka Swiffer). As I am writing this I am realizing I do not decorate for me I decorate with the others in mind. Don't get me wrong I'm a chicken freak and you'll see them all over my house but I really do think of the Lord & others before myself.

Since I have always done well with some structure I usually work off of lists and schedules. Accordingly, I love Flylady which provides me with my daily marching orders. I also use Microsoft outlooks calendar, tasks & e-mail. My final weapon is a miniature spiral I keep in my purse that I jot down my to do list & errands. These tools enable me to professionally manage my house and things seem to get done in a more orderly fashion.

So, when you come to my house you will (hopefully for your sake) not say forget the plates I'm gonna eat right off these floors! But hopefully, you won't be distracted by clutter, lots of work undone, feet sticking to floors and too many mounds of laundry. But what I hope you say is I feel right at home, and that you are able to kick up your feet, and your able to have your crawler on the floor and most of all I hope you feel loved here. The main thing I have come to realize is that I serve God through serving my family and you.

Thoughts on question 10: Mondays are really hard days for me because on Sunday I really try hard to rest and not fuss. So on Monday the house is totaled. I am working with my family to help keep the house up a little better on Sundays but as of today Monday morning rolls around and I am unable to concentrate on school until I get this place under control. I am going to have to start getting up earlier so I can neaten before school. Laundry has always been my arch nemesis. Currently, my challenge is learning to manage my new house. Especially, the laundry room which is trying to become a catch all. I am on a laundry schedule that works pretty well for me now but still I find it to be difficult to keep up at times. Additionally, right now I do not have enough hangers to hang up all of our clothes, since I threw some away in the move. That does not help my laundry situation!

Please share....Is homemaking what you thought it would be or is it different if so how? What challenges are you facing in your home? Take a minute to visualize your home as a haven. What do you see? Share this vision with the blog!

Happy Homemaking

RH

A Big Day for the McVays

It's one thing to say you live on a farm, to want to live on a farm, to move out on some land but it's a whole 'nother thing to start getting the animals. Today we made our first purchase of farm animals. 8 Rhode Island Red Chickens a dual purpose meat/egg bird. Since we hope to get eggs and meat from our birds these are the kind we choose. We'll have farm fresh eggs in about 15-16 weeks. We still need to get a rooster. We hope to sell eggs, broilers & live chicks/birds.

The second big thing for us today is we got a new (to us) van! In case you do not know the story behind our current van...It has $2700 worth of repairs that need to be made! The Van itself is worth a whooping $3300. We are putting 4-5 qts of oil in the thing to keep it running. It always smells like burning oil and when we get out of the car on a rainy day the kids are always so excited to see the (oil) rainbow on the ground! Every time I stopped at a light or stop sign I'd wonder if we were going to be able to go. We have been driving our white van for at least the last 6 weeks just waiting for it to die or for its oil consumption to get ridiculous. Or perhaps for it to catch fire in an intersection, if your vehicle catches fire that is always a sign that it's time to get a new one! Well the Lord was good to us because there was a Toyota Sienna at Palmer Kia cheap we took it to our mechanic and they gave it the thumbs up! This was such a good deal that the dealership had other people putting money down on the van in case we backed out. We'll we finally got all of the paperwork completed between insurance, Credit Union & Kia (mostly via Internet & phone) and drove off the lot after 15 minutes (literally!). Now we think we have a vehicle that is in good enough shape to make a trip to California to see Wayne's folks. We'll see my folks too but my folks come and visit us about 2X a year here in Texas!

Our final bit of news is that we have a name for the place.....Rooster Hill! I love stuff with chickens, we have crazy chicken lamps, and lots of chicken stuff around the house and the house is up on a hill (a small Texas Hill) !

So Happy Homemaking from Rooster Hill!

Counting the cost of Homemade Laundry Detergent

Kim and I have been lurking on the Supercinski & Kramer blogs checking out their laundry detergents. Now Kim has made them and used them and she likes how the clothing is nice and clean. Kim and I are not green, unless by green you mean we keep an eye on our green! My first concern is my budget we cannot go over budget, something simply would not get paid! Accordingly, Kim (the perfectionist side of the friendship) worked out the exact cost of each of the cleaners we made.

We would save some money but not enough to get us to add laundry making to cleaning & cooking from scratch. But they also mentioned liquid detergent as an option so with a quick Google search I came upon this liquid recipes from Thrifty fun for a liquid detergent formula:

You will need:
Bar of Ivory soap (.33 per bar)
1 cup of washing soda (Arm and Hammer for example) (.35)
1 cup borax (.28) (Kyle added Borax to the recipe!)
Price = .96 for 24 loads! (So 1.92 a month for my family!)

1. 
   Water Directions:Fill large bucket or container with 3 gallons of hot tap water. Grate the bar of soap into a saucepan. Add just enough water to cover the soap, and heat, stirring constantly until soap is dissolved.
2. Add soap/water mixture to the hot water in the bucket. Stir to combine. Add 1 cup of washing soda & borax and stir (do not mix up these steps). As this cools, it will turn into a white gelatinous soap. Thickness depends on the size of bucket used.
3. Use 1 1/2 to 2 cups per load of laundry. You can add 1/2 cup of baking soda to the load as well.

As a testimony to my cheapness you will notice I am using the cap from my old detergent bottle I just measured the amount of liquid (1/2 cup) that would fit in it and am happily using it!

I have now washed my clothes with this gelatinous laundry soap and they have come out very clean. The only thing I do not like is the fact that the clothing has absolutely no aroma. I really enjoy the smell of freshly cleaned laundry. I am going to try some essential oils in the mixture to see if they will impart a smell on the clothing. But in the meantime I am going to start using Downy or Snuggle fabric softener.

Final Price Comparison @ 110 loads

• Arm & Hammer $8.47 or .07 per load
• Powder $12.10 (1/4 cup serving) or .11 per load
• Powder $29.70 (1/2 cup serving) or .27 per load
• Liquid Homemade (1 1/2 cup serving) 4.40 or .04 per load

So I will save $4.07 each month/batch & $48.48 each year. Now I have $4 more $ in my budget for food for Big Baby!

Now if you use Tide or some other high dollar laundry soap then you will have an even greater savings in every category. I do not use Tide because I found other laundry detergent that does a great job for a lot less money. But let me tell you something about Tide I learned this summer while living in a travel trailer, now remember I am not green (I am not anti-green but I am not green) They use Tide to clean out the portable potties they use on construction sites! I do not know what is in Tide but that is scary strong!

By the way Kim is still working out the prices on the dishwasher soap.

Now as for the other cleaners they have mentioned on their blogs. Kim and I were already happily using soap, water and vinegar spray. Now we are trying all of the other products that they have created. This is so great! Not only can we clean our homes well with these things they are very economical! I'll see if I can get Kim to break down the prices on the various cleaning solutions and post that also.

In Martha Stewart's Home keeping book she talks about a clean house has no odor at all. Most of these products are somewhat odorless unless you add essential oils, which again I am frugal, is unlikely for me. So my candles will really shine as my home is cleaner and yes Lyns & Rachel greener because of these wonderful ladies! So thanks so much to Lyns and Rachel for being the pioneers and getting me to think outside of the box...the laundry box that is! On the side of my blog is a link to Rachel's cleaning products!

Finally, I'll put my first post for the Making your Home a Haven by Sunday! I hope all of you new homemakers are reading this book and finding it to be very helpful.

Happy Homemaking!

What's happening on the homestead....

Yes you are another contestant on Name That Farm! ....

We need help naming the farm. We are pitiful, sorrowful not creative pathetic etc... Here are the names we have:

• McVay Farms
• Glory Farms
• Glory Acres
• Hallelujah Homestead (from Lynsey @ yonderway farm ...how cool is that name!)
• Boondocks (My Dad)
• Bacon and Eggs Farm(Wayne)

Now is not the time to lurk, now is the time to act! Please comment if you have any name that may possibly be acceptable please I beg of you comment. What it looks like we are going to offer is the following: organic herbs, free range chicken & eggs, acorn finished hogs & baby hogs, overflow veggies, oak bbq firewood. Most likely all business will be done off of a website so we need a cute, cool, totally fun, us, type of name. And of course a place of constant meals & lodging for friends and family we'd really love to have a "Country Day" for inner city kids or bring kids out to see where their food comes from (You know however God directs us those are my ideas his may be different!).

Update on the Homestead happenings.........

Grandparents visit- My parents were in town Monday 25th - Saturday 1st and we had such a wonderful time. They even purchased the kids a super cool swing set that may take Wayne the next 5 or so months to put together! by the visiting grandparents is being built by the wonderful Mr. McVay (That is why I was working on the chicken coop). Grandma even helped me roof the chicken coop. Surprisingly, she was not in high heels at the time (Truly that is a miracle).

One of our favorite days each week Julie & Brandi (and sometimes Fernando) Mondays! Thank goodness they were faithfully here,this Monday because they were able to drop me off at the Rock Prairie Kroger's so I could drive my poor exhausted parents to the house which as my Dad noted is "in the middle of nowhere". Of course, we aren't in the middle of no where, the middle of no where is next door!

Offer hospitality to one another without grumbling.1 Peter 4:9

* The chicken Coop - The name of our coop is the 'Coup Deville" (named by my man!) The chicken coop is almost done. I roofed it this weekend (yes, you read that correctly!) Now we are just adding the chicken wire and the nesting boxes and we are done & ready for chickens. Halei is our first chicken! But she refuses to lay eggs!

The shed- is 1/8 painted and 95% done.

The 5th wheel- Still not sold.

Herb Garden - We planted the herb garden by the front door we have rosemary, basil, parsley, mint, chives and a strawberry bush. I know a strawberry bush is not exactly an herb but I couldn't help myself. I love using fresh herbs when I am cooking, I totally feel like Martha Stewart when you go outside to get some of your ingredients. The Family Herb Garden is planted! In fact just this morning I went and grabbed some oregano & parsley for our breakfast burritos. I am looking foward to getting the eggs from the hen house soon!


Garden - We are starting seedlings for the Fall Garden. I have picked the veggies we will be growing and I am going to order some seed catalogs. I am really reading "Tiny Farm Blog" so I can grow my veggies organically. The kids love to go out in the garden and eat the food straight off the vine. We will have mushroom compost delivered in April for the Spring garden. Our main garden is going to be expanded and moved. We need to expand it to at least 90x90 to feed our family and to have a little extra. So over the next 6 months - year we'll be working on this project. Then the current garden will be used as a berry patch. It is apx. 25X25.

Snake Killing: Copperhead on Saturday...booyah!

That's all for now for the McFarm & Ranch Report....

Hey, when are you coming out to the country, seriously when?

What kind of pot are we?

Jeremiah reminds me of present time as all throughout Jeremiah the Lord is warning his people that unless they turn from their sins and return to him destruction is coming. In Jeremiah he provides us with this beautiful image of the Lord molding us and handling us:

Jeremiah 18:1-9
This is the word that came to Jeremiah from the LORD : 2 "Go down to the potter's house, and there I will give you my message." 3 So I went down to the potter's house, and I saw him working at the wheel. 4 But the pot he was shaping from the clay was marred in his hands; so the potter formed it into another pot, shaping it as seemed best to him.
5 Then the word of the LORD came to me: 6 "O house of Israel, can I not do with you as this potter does?" declares the LORD. "Like clay in the hand of the potter, so are you in my hand, O house of Israel. 7 If at any time I announce that a nation or kingdom is to be uprooted, torn down and destroyed, 8 and if that nation I warned repents of its evil, then I will relent and not inflict on it the disaster I had planned.

I love this verse to know that the Lord can shape us and mold us into something wonderful and beautiful. That he his fingers are all over us as he is doing this and that we have such an intimate knowledge of him and he of us! What I had failed to notice is this verse that comes in the next chapter:

This is what the LORD says: "Go and buy a clay jar from a potter. Take along some of the elders of the people and of the priests 2 and go out to the Valley of Ben Hinnom, near the entrance of the Potsherd Gate. There proclaim the words I tell you, 3 and say, 'Hear the word of the LORD, O kings of Judah and people of Jerusalem. This is what the LORD Almighty, the God of Israel, says: Listen! I am going to bring a disaster on this place that will make the ears of everyone who hears of it tingle...... 10 "Then break the jar while those who go with you are watching, 11 and say to them, 'This is what the LORD Almighty says: I will smash this nation and this city just as this potter's jar is smashed and cannot be repaired. Jeremiah 19:1-3,10

I do not pretend to fully understand the word of the Lord but to me it seems like we are in one of two conditions. We are still malleable and able to be formed and worked with like the clay in Chapter 18. Or we have hardened our hearts, closed our ears and we are doing what is evil in the sight of the Lord. Then what else is there to do with us but to break us like this pot. That we would never be the same like in Chapter 18.

To me that is terrifying that we could come to this point where all that is left is to smash as an example to others.

All throughout Jeremiah the Lord keeps warning us against backsliding: Jeremiah 15:6You have rejected me," declares the LORD. "You keep on backsliding. So I will lay hands on you and destroy you; I can no longer show compassion. (& Jeremiah 2:19, 3:22,5:6,4:17)

This terrifying to me to know that I have to guard against backsliding like the Israelites who were in their second generation of pagan worship. We may not worship Baal but what are our idols, the things we mediate upon, memorize, watch for read etc...eating, shopping, tv, other people, our children, spouses, church??? I know I am guilty but the Lord has provided a way out in Isiah the Lord tells us we have be watchmen

Isaiah 62:6 6 I have posted watchmen on your walls, O Jerusalem; they will never be silent day or night. You who call on the LORD, give yourselves no rest

Are we backsliding as a church? What is keeping us from reading our Bibles and knowing what He says, prayer, meditating on his word, fasting....It's terrifying to me, it's constantly on my mind.

Are we still malleable, there are so many of us that have already been broken. What does the Lord lay on your heart on a regular basis? Do you fear the Lord? To whom are you accountable, who is watching over you? If you want me to help you be matched up in prayer group post that too.