I find that as I put aside surprise or disappointment and accept the truths of the word days have become more peaceful. Jeremiah 4:22
So I said all of this just to get to my great advice search the scriptures for your marching orders. Pray and talk to your God about your kids and PRAY some more.
1 Thessalonians 5:16-18 Be joyful always; pray continually; give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.His word is clear.We are raising a mighty army for God...one (sometimes long but always meaningful) day at a time with a bucket load of grace.
NOTE: All mentions of God (my God, your God etc...) are the great I AM the one true God.